Thursday, September 10, 2009

i miss u

when i look at the notification side in my fb, there's one thing captures my attention.
"upload pic of your grandparents.keep the memory alive"

suddenly i remember my late grandfather and grandmother on my father's side. my late grandfather was a great man. although he looked very strict but i know he had a kind and soft heart inside. unfortunately, i've little memory with my grandfather and i'm very sad since i realise how much i miss him now. i still remember during my child years, he and my grandmother used to take care of me while my parents at work. my grandparents' house was near the river and he always went there for fishing. i used to follow him around without telling my grandmother bcz i knew she won't allow me to go along. owh, i forget to mention that i used to call him 'baba'. Baba loved to sleep and before sleeping, he made sure that my grandmother was ok. sadly, that's only the memory remains about baba. he died because of 'jantung berlubang' when i was in standard 2.

my grandmother used to live with my family after baba left. since my house is a double stories, she can't bare to live with us since there's stairs to climb on.she can't walk bcz of her legs.she don't want my family felt burden bcz of her disability to walk like a normal person. so, she decided to go back to her own house. but we reluctant to send her and decided the best way was to bring her to my uncle's house nearby. i went there to see her everyday. brought her food, helped her take a bath, combed her hair and even dressed her up. i felt happy when i did all those things. until i got an offer to a boarding school. i can't see her everyday but i was ok with that since my brothers were around. i thought all the days, months and years she lived there, she was happy but i was wrong. my s***** cousins didn't take care of her that good since they cn't bare with my grandmother's way of speak. i knew that sometimes she quite harsh but bare with it ok.she was our grandmother.she used to take care of all of us without any complaint. i asked my father to bring her back to our house and my brother slept with her everynight in front of tv. i was happy when i saw her eating her breakfast, lunch and dinner. she used to tell me her secret. she ate nothing several days before since she didn't hv anything to eat n she was sick, didn't hv any drive to move. s****** cousins!!
one day, i used to see my grandmother crying in the toilet while taking her bath. she told me that she wanted to die so that my family can live freely without thinking of her. she missed my grandfather alot but didn't tell anyone about that, even my father......and i cried with her that day....n i don't stop crying until now..everytime i remember her face, i sort of sad....bcz i miss her so much...if i can turn the time backward, i want to love her all my heart and take care of her every single breath of mine.....

i miss u

Saturday, August 22, 2009

narrative discourse~

salam sume..
today is our first day of fasting..alhamdulillah, slamt mnjlnkn kwjbn 1st day of fasting. u noe wat, today is the most memorable day of my life.1st time pose kt ovrc as well as 1st time bukak pose dlm lift..hahahaha..xsmpt smpai umh,bru blik dr kerje..seb baek aio ade.die bg kuey ketayap sbgai alas prot bukak pose. thanx aio..

xde pe da nk cite.nk smbg buat task eng 117 lak.esok nk kene antr. mntk dr dlu..
salam

Wednesday, August 19, 2009

Ramadhan Al-Mubarak kembali lg~

salam semua..
selamat menyambut bulan Ramadhan Al-Mubarak n slamt berpuase..rase happy giler2 sbb bln mulia da kembali lg. and the most important thing is this is my first time fasting oversea. in to be more specific, at wellington, new zealand. feel lucky because i've the chances to experience this barakah month in foreign country. my dream comes true.yeay!
yesterday, i skyped with my parents. my father has faith in me and believe that i can survive fasting here. of course abah!because it's shorter than fasting in malaysia.that is the very good thing!hehehe. just have to wake up around 5 am for sahur and surprisingly at 6 pm, it's already 'bukak puase' time..so lucky!
i'm just worried about my mom. last year, she used to cry during bukak puase because she thought of my brother, kimi who was working at mekah for that time. she also cried during pagi raye.poor mom~ i can't stand seeing my mom cry and i can't forgive myself if she cries because of me. T_T.
to my beloved and lovely mom, don't worry about me.i'm okay here and live well.just take care of yourself and pls do't work too much.u need to rest sometimes and eat well..i miss you mom..miss you so much..
i miss u too abah!
p/s: i sempat pesan kt abah suh simpan duit raye taun ni..ujung taun ni nk claim..hehehehe

Saturday, August 8, 2009

CiLakAk PuNyE MAt SaLEH!!

~hari ini dalam sejarah~
setelah bberape bln dok kt bumi brtuah the windy welly a.k.a bumi maori berangin sepoi2 xbrbahase, bru i realise dat mamat2 mat salleh yg aku rase OMG hot nye!!! ni rupenye xreti brbudi bhs+brtatasusila..aiii, rugi2..muke pnyela ensem cm Johnny Depp tp perangai cm cipan..mase kt library td, daa sah2 auntie tekan bell as a reminder yg lib daa nk tutp, pndai2la find a way out..tp ade sorg mmt kt level aku keje buat xtau je..bt pekak je..klu tlnga ngh sumbt ngan earphone leyla diterime g kepekakan tu tp ni x..1st tu aku bt xtau je sbb nk tgk reaction die. 2nd bell bnyik pon buat dunno..ley than mmt nie cbr kewanitaan aku..(p/s: wanita ke??hikhikhik)..so, aku pe lg.ngan lngkh brgaye+ykin ckp kt mmt tu suh kluar..ckp cmni:

aku: xcuse me.sorry, we're closing the library now.pls could u leave now?
mt saleh tu:yea, i know.i'm going now..

stlh bbrpe minit, die still ade kt situ ngn cmputer yg masih on (kt com site)

aku: xcuse me.i'm really sorry.could u leave now?
mt saleh: wait a minute. i've to finish my assgmnt 1st..
aku:but we're closing..like NOW..(control ayu)
mat saleh: hey, chill girl..i'm going..(ngan muke x brslh, die pack bag lalu blah)

ingtkn da abes part x brbudi bhase, ade lg rupenye..tyme pg cumberland td,jmpe ramai mt saleh kt bwh, ngh lepak ngn kwn2 n buat havoc..tyme lalu kt situ, ade sorg ckp 'hey u,do u hv fire?' pastu gelk2..xphm aku..mntk lightr tp pastu gelk2 smbl ckp 'shit'..

yg part xde tatasusila plak brmule d tmpt yg same..ade 3 org mat saleh ni ngh tnggu pe ntah kt bus stop..tyme tu diorg pakai suit nk g ball..encem..ssh nk jmpe kt mlysia students pakai suit pg dinner..siap bow lg..tp pakai proper, mulut ley thn..mnjerit2 pnggil kwn2 diorg kt aprtmnt ats smbil ckp 'fuck'..watch out your words, moron!!! yg mat saleh kt ats lak, pnjt tepi window pastu bukk sluar..astaghfirullah..xmlu btol..cept2 aku ttp tngkp blik..abes pmndgn indh brltr blkgkn wellington city aku mlm ni..stupid!!!!

Wednesday, August 5, 2009

hidop xslalu ceria T_T

org ckp hidop kene slalu ceria, bru enjoy.hidop kene slumber,bru rock.hari ni adlh hari ni,esok da ari lain..so enjoy puas2 arini..ade la betolnye falsafh tu.....
tp.................................
aku xtau nape aku sedey sgt2 arini..dr pg lg..jmpe kwn2 arini, buat muke ceria je..mcm xde pape mslh..blik kels td aku g lepak sorg2 kt cuba street..merayau mcm xde arah tujuan..bile smpai bilik, hati aku 0..xde pape..aku xrase pape kcuali despair...bile bkk cite klakr2 pon,pas abes tgk+mkn, rase tu still ade...still xilang..air mate mncurah2 mcm air terjun daa..tisu pon da abes 2 plastik..thnk GOD ade sha..die comfortkn aku..die gtau yg myb aku ade bt slh smthg yg myb aku sndr xprasn..so,to all my friends, i'm truly sorry if i ever hurt u in any way, don't mean it..sorry...T_T

p/s: thanx sha.i really love u..thnx for being there for me when i'm ok or not..u'r my best friend (flo jgk tp 2nite die x on9)..i miss both of u so much.....

Monday, August 3, 2009

hObi bAru~

gmbr kt bwh ni amk mase kt taupo, odw blik dr rotorua.tyme tu brnti mkn+solat jap.. ni la schedule aku for dis sem yg bz mcm nk mati..yg kaler2 +dlm circle tu assessmnt+test on da same day...*sigh* T_T
container kt depn tu aku beli kt 2 dolar shop..murah je+cntik..hehehe..tyme ni ngh gatal2 tgn nk amek gmbr property sndr..bru je blik dr rugby nite+smpai bilik..teros snap gmbr ni..

daa lame daa nk amek gmbr cmni..rase kagum lak bile daa dpt wlaupon amek ngn camera cybershot pink ku yg biase tu...hehehe *gumbira*